Poor Poor Lilredneck

We took the youngins for a walk today, we have decided to walk as often as we can, cus, the hubby is fat (his words not mine). He is on a diet, he has given up pop and bread and is having a helluva time with it, he says it's harder then quitting smoking. He has already lost sum weight, though we don't know exactly how much, because he got mad at the scale a few months ago and junked it.
Anyway, the reactions of us taking a walk were comical, the whole neighborhood thought we ran out of gas and people were asking if we needed a ride to the station. Then they started taking pictures of us....This is what happens when you live in a small town...I guess jogging is out of the question.
On the way home we ended up with a tag along. We walked past a 'FREE PUPPY' sign. Me and the ol' man pretended we didn't see it, until the pups came a runnin' and the girls started oohing and aahing... S....H....I....T.
Then one of the pups decided he liked us and followed us all the way home. All of my husbands cussing, yelling and trying to chase this pup away didn't even phase it. He followed us home, then ran in the house like he owned it and settled down on Teffas' bed, like it was his. Very cute, but..... NO !!!

We stayed strong though, even through all the begging and pleading and the big blue teary eyes.We took the pup back! Yep, we suck rule.

After our celebrity walk and the doggy drama, we got ready to spend the rest of the day at the beach. We're all dressed and ready, the picnic was packed and I had my book in hand, then I remembered that I had to work :(
Not my normal night to work but, I took the night before off, to go to a euchre tournament... I lost btw, but the hubs took second place.
Long faces and some cussing tears too, I went off to work. I tried not to show my disappointment (smiles get more tips then frowns) So, all night I felt like shit for letting my family down, then I started thinking about this blog and getting upset over it too.
For awhile now I've been writing in this damn blog, trying to make it pretty and all. I made this adorable cute header and I've been making sure I take pictures of all the shit I plan on blogging about. I tweet every time I write, trying to get some followers and maybe some comments. So far, I only have two followers, and one of them is ME ......Don't know how I did that.....shut up...
WTF, people I'm funny... read me and you'd see. I figured I'm going to have to get serious and take sum drastic measures.. yer making me do it.
I came up with a PLAN... he he he witches cackle. I've decided to give you all an ultimatum ~ Follow me, or I will sent you very evil thoughts from my only slightly dysfunctional massive brain' !!!! I'm serious now, so beware, many have doubted and many have felt my power (usually, when they're taking their morning shit and it hurts their assholes) ha ha fuckers that's me....... so no more doubts or next I'll maka you buttholes bleed. he he he witches cackle
Beware... My redneck bullshit power is extreme...
So unless you want to walk around all day with a pain that only time can cure...... FOLLOW.....
And don't forget to go visit My Awesome Website and buy stuff play around.
Let me know what you think!

Evil Thoughts Abound

Tonight was the second day of eight days in a row at work. I thought I'd hold up better but I got pissy as soon as I walked in and seen that nothing was stocked or done. This is not a good sign when I have six more days to go, I sure hope no one gets hurt I can make it.
I do my damn job I don't slack, but I also don't bitch. This happens more and more lately and now it's gettin real old, my boss won't listen to shit ex-specially about this girl, the suck up favorite. Well I'm resorting to one of my Mamas favorite lines 'If you want it done right ya best just do it yourself.' So all night while watching the drunks get drunker (and yes it's possible stupider.......I don't know how they do it) I was hatching evil plans. Most of these evil plans I had to discount because I'm really not that evil, just my thoughts and only half the time sometimes. I mean come on, how could flattening her tires make her start stocking the fuckin coolers? That would only make me feel better look bad if I got caught, and giving her the black eye I want to would sure make her look bad, but how could doing that possibly make me look good?
After gettin rid of the fun, feel good, evil bad ideas I decided to just do the same to her, I do days tomorrow and she follows me, so I'm gonna not stock and totally slack and if she says anything I'll just sweetly say 'well that's how you left it for me yesterday' or 'well I thought that's how we do it now adays' or 'paybacks are a bitch huh' or 'well I decided to test out this slackin thing and I'm thinkin I like it' ~ I don't know what I'll say, it'll come to me when she says somethin bout it, which she will, cus she's like that and I'll just say whatever snide remark that comes into my head. If that don't work, I'll just go to my roots, my core if ya will, 'the redneck way' and say "hey bitch, stock yer shit or git hit"
The redneck way is usually the simplest and fasted way to get anything done, I don't know why I usually save it for a last resort, maybe has something to do with being excepted in polite society and all that, but, what, I ask you is polite about not doing your job and leaving your work, so a sweet, pleasent, funny little redneck ends up doing it for you. HOW RUDE